Family: Uniting Life and Love

Readings for the Feast of the Holy Family

Sirach 3:2-6, 12-14
Psalm 128:1-5
Colossians 3:12-21
Luke 2:41-52
USCCB Link to the Readings

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Given the value the Catholic Church places on family, we should celebrate today’s Feast of the Holy Family with special joy and gratitude—and a firm commitment to strengthen our families.

Family in God’s Plan. Family life is where our deepest desires and God’s plan can converge. In his apostolic exhortation Familiaris Consortio [On the Family], John Paul II wrote: “The family finds in the plan of God … not only its identity, what it is, but also its mission, what it can and should do.” Then, the Pope summarizes the family’s identity and mission in a single phrase: “an intimate community of life and love” (FC 17). Yes, that is what God creates and intends it to become.

A Perfect Family? One great myth that should be laid to rest is that of “the perfect family.” Our family is not holy because it is perfect; it is holy because God’s grace is at work in it, helping it to set out each day on the pathway of love. Creating a stronger family means starting with the one you have: accept its limitations, value its strengths, believe God has called and blessed your family.

Family Dynamics. Jack Dominian, the respected British family life counselor, summarizes the family love relationship in three essential, interrelated elements: SUSTAINING, HEALING, and GROWING. These concrete ways of loving are central to healthy marriage and family life.

First Dynamic. SUSTAINING LOVE includes day-by-day loving interaction, expressed in five phases. It requires availability, being physically and emotionally close to each other. Communication follows and it includes talking, listening, sharing, and confronting each other. There should be demonstration of affection (a kiss, a hug, an embrace, a kind word). Affirmation or appreciation must be expressed. Resolution of conflict is needed through forgiveness and reconciliation. These five ways of giving sustaining love are central to marriage and family; every time the couple and their children participate in this sustaining loving they are praying.

Second Dimension. We are all wounded people; our wounds are manifested in our relationships. HEALING LOVE seeks to identify these mutual wounds and tries to remedy them. This can be done in many ways: offering security for insecurity, acceptance for rejection, appreciation for poor self-esteem, courage for fear, and so on. Marriage and family life are probably the most important sources of healing in society.

Third Factor. MUTUAL GROWTH is the third dimension of marital-familial love. Over the years and decades of life, a family facilitates the development and growth of all members, seen through achievements in social, emotional, and intellectual goals. In fact, the realities of daily family life constitute their “liturgy,” and it is the ordinary experiences of the week that they bring to Sunday Mass as their offering.

Family solidarity can be achieved through ordinary activities like the following:

Pray with and for one another;
Spend time together;
Play and work together;
Share meals;
Talk about significant matters;
Respect and trust one another;
Develop family traditions;
Do something for others;
Seek outside support;
Ask for professional help if needed.

Resolution. Fathers, mothers, children, ask God’s grace to become “an intimate community of life and love” on this Holy Family Sunday. Your prayer will be heard!

Notes on the Sunday Readings

First Reading
Sirach 3:26-12-14 – Written two centuries before Christ, this reading from Sirach contains wise counsels on how to lead a life pleasing to God and the respectful relationship expected between parents and children

Responsorial Psalm
Psalm 128:1-5 – This psalm portrays the ideal relationship that should exist between fathers, mothers, and children; it includes reverence, consideration, and kindness.

Second Reading
Colossians 3:12-21 – This reading contains beautiful advice from Saint Paul on the virtues to be found in family life, especially charity toward one another. Paul advises his readers: “Let the word of Christ, rich as it is, dwell in you.”

Gospel
Luke 1:39-45 – Today’s Gospel portrays the Holy Family fulfilling its religious duties. It also shows Mary’s deep faith. Though she did not understand the explanation that her son Jesus offered her for his disappearance, she kept all these things in her heart and memory.

Notes and Commentary by Maryknoller James H. Kroeger, who has recently published Walking with Pope Francis: The Official Documents in Everyday Language (Orbis Books – 2023) and Exploring Vatican II Treasures: Actors, Events, Insights, commemorating the sixtieth anniversary of the close of Vatican II [1965-2025] (Faith Alive Books – 2024).

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